| Hello Dear Ones,
I’m not exactly sure what made me turn my attention back to kiteboarding.
Way back in the middle of December, frustrated and discouraged by my personal best of 3 seconds up on the board, the holiday visit of friends and lousy wind conditions merged to give me the perfect excuse to take a short break from lessons.
That “short” break turned into two-and-a-half months.
The longing to take more lessons crept up on me and two weeks ago I found myself heading into the water with board, kite and my very patient instructor, Nelson.
My thoughts were full of nonsense disguised as truth: “I know I’ve forgotten everything.” “I’ll be back at square one, starting all over again.” “I’m not even going to remember how to fly the kite. “ What are you thinking?” … No original, creative or inspiring thoughts at all! lol.
Naturally, I was shocked when I was amazing! Certainly, none of the spectators on the beach (apart from my devoted instructor and husband) would have used the word “amazing!” for the short rides I was having; nevertheless, I delightfully amazed myself. My body knew what to do and it was happy.
Later, when my neighbor who brings home medals from international kiteboarding competitions asked how my kiteboarding went, my huge smile was the best answer I could give her. And when her response was “you forgot what you had to remember,” it twisted my brain a little bit and I took a mental double- take …
Her comment was laced with a hint of experienced chuckle … You forgot what you had to remember.
I forgot what I had to remember and I flew across the ocean’s swells with a big smile on my face.
20 years ago, after a long, information packed day during a tantra certification training, I was melting into a massage table while struggling to hold onto information, make mental connections and put new pieces of information together. Not really needing an answer I asked the massage therapist “how do I remember all of this?”
You’ll remember what you need to know when you need to know it, was her reply.
Now I’m reflecting on the remembering that is deeper than my grasping and fenagling. I’m wondering about the remembering that doesn’t use words. I’m curious how much I can let go and trust forgetting.
I forgot what I had to remember
I remembered what I need know when I needed to know it.
As I’m putting the finishing touches on this note another memory has bubbled up. It’s a moment over 30 years ago when I was teaching a beginning Swedish massage course. One of the students came to me moments before the final exam. He was stressing out about the possibility of forgetting the stokes, sequences, the “everythings” … he was sure he’d forget “it all” and not pass the course. My response was to relax and make it up; that’s when the massage you’re giving becomes your art.
And today maybe I’d add “forget what you think you have to remember … and have fun!”
Sailing into love with you,
Sharon |
